Well...that could have gone better!

Last year didn't turn out quite as stunning as I had planned in weight loss and all. Hmmm...I've actually started over this year. And my started over, I mean I'm moving really, really slowly. I am pretty sure I've lost the same five pounds throughout this entire year.

But, with that said, I am ready to work hard at not gaining weight and stop avoiding all the things that fat girls shouldn't do. My "what fat girls shouldn't do" list this is my own mental list that restricts me from doing certain things because, frankly, I'm too fat.

1) visiting family: I'm going to go in July (if work isn't too hectic)...don't want to see people and hear me called "fluffy," but these peeps are family, and I can't avoid them forever!

2) buying a dress: I almost bought one the other day. Maybe when I lost 10 lbs (see? I'll still be fat but will have a dress. Makes sense in my own head.)

3) go to the craft store: I went to my favorite craft store a few months after I had my child and the owner asked if I was expecting again. That was nearly four years ago. Haven't been back sense. But I really do love the merchandise...and really want to go back.

That's all for now. It's nap time at our house. I've been meaning to post for ages and wanted to get something down while I was thinking about it. Happy Memorial Day weekend!!!

Trying 1-day liquified diet

Not "liquid" diet...and not calorie/fat restrictions either. This is a vegetarian day where I just happen to puree all my food, keeping it to healthy stuff..steamed veggies, soup, whole grains, no meat, no heavy cheese...

Deepak says to do this once per week to balance my Kapha dosha...meaning until I have lost some weight, but more importantly, until my digestion is robust.

Then there's a whole thing about sipping hot water once every half hour.

So for breakfast I had an oatmeal, blueberry, banana, almond "smoothie" with a half cup of hot milk.

yum..actually pretty tasty.

Then there will be some veggie soups, and maybe beans and rice later today.

i'll let you know if i survive. Last time I think I wound up w/ a cheeseburger around 5pm.

Feeling better

I've been working w/ different ways to limit my refined sugar intake.

One treat a day seems to work the best. I always know I've got something good coming, and it makes it easier to resist extra stuff...except when you have the chocolate days :). Then i think 2 treats is a good way to go.

I've also been in good phase of cooking, which is fun. I love to get in the kitchen and try stuff out. Today it's two dishes...which i'm making for my friend Michele before we go to see a band tonight (we are both broke because we all went to Hawaii back in October. Long story...beautiful place).

Garlicky baked butternut squash

and Shrimp Scampi w/pasta and Kale

Super duper YUM.

Will report back!

Alternative Health Frustration

I gorged last night...

Not on food, but on information. A while back a cute little woman of chinese heritage running a smoothie shop informed me that I had "the yeast". She said that the overeating i do, and sugar cravings are from something called a Systemic Candida infection. (too much yeast inhabiting your digestive tract, or other areas of your body).

So i search for this off and on, and I'm totally saturated w/ the information that is available on the web and in books that I've taken out of the library.

And...as is usual w/ alt health stuff...I'm confused. Tired of searching for myself, and interested in just fixing this (if it's in fact "the yeast" that I have)

I've come to the conclusion that when anything is extremely complex (like being overweight) you find that a lot of people label themselves as "experts" and will happily give you their opinions.

So what I like to do is to read what the experts say and draw my own non-expert conclusions by looking for the overlap, and the most practical options for me.

Here's the overlap on the yeast...and in stopping sugar cravings...

1. Cut most of the sugar out of your diet. Raw honey is ok, but use it sparingly
2. Limit fruit to 2-3 servings a day...it's better than sugar tho, so if you crave sugar, eat fruit instead
3. Eat more vegetables, preferably those that are lower on the glycemic index
4. Reduce the amount of fat you eat...no fried foods at all.
5. Exercise regularly.
6. Get enough sleep
7. Drink lots of warm and hot water and herbal teas.
8. Use a neti pot/sinus rinsing device at least daily
9. Stop eating vinegar, start using lemon juice instead.
10. Talk to a qualified alt health practitioner and detrmine if you do, indeed, have "the yeast"

#10 kind of freaks me out. Insurance doesn't typically cover alt health practitioners...so i'm going to do some research to find one or more that I can try out. If the woman @ OR Smoothies is right, then I've got a long term problem to solve.

If not, then steps 1-9 are just plain healthy advice.

Too bad i have $50 worth of Girl Scout cookies ...

Self-massage

Deepak has many suggestions for daily practices that will keep you happpier and healthier.

One of them is self massage...

For those of us who are overweight, we have a "Kapha" imbalance... meaning that we are accumulating and carrying excess baggage...mentally, physically, emotionally.

Another thing to remember is that when under stress, everyone gets out of touch with his or her body.

Enter: the dry massage

and Abhyanga, sesame oil massage.

First: Dry massage: Take a dry loofah...over "long" bones or arms and legs do back and forth motion...20-40 times.

At your joints use a circular motion

I was very skeptical that this would be good on my skin...but it leaves me w/ a "buzz". It is invigorating and definitely wakes up my body.

Second: Follow dry massage w/ a sesame oil massage. Warm a small amount in your hand (or have a small plastic bottle and warm that in hot water). Starting w/ your scalp and using circular motions, massage all over w/ sesame oil. pay special attention to your feet.

then follow all of THAT with a steaming hot shower.

Repeat daily.

After all of this, i felt AMAZING. Relaxed and alert. Calm. bright eyed. Coffee? who needs coffee?

This total took me about 20-30 min. Right now i can't add that to my routine daily, but oh what a world it would be if i could.

Clean the office...or make Ayurvedic food

Make Ayurvedic food in an effort to avoid the office. ...

Hey. Don't Judge. Deepak said "you need to boil your milk"

and then he said "Ghee is purified butter. it is what you should cook with. so spend at least an hour on your saturday or sunday skimming the crap off the top of it.

God, I love Deepak. Meanwhile, my office has more and more crap piled into it.

But i have clarified butter...and boiled milk.

The boiled milk is actually kind of tasty. and i have been really drinking a lot of it. So Thumbs Up, Deepak!

So far i haven't made anything w/ the ghee (clarified butter...melt butter and skim the crap off the top, then pour the middle layer into a clean bowl leaving the bottom layer of crap in the pan. I read after i did it this way that you can achieve the same effect faster by straining through a cheesecloth).

Tomorrow i'll tell you what it's like to massage yourself w/ Sesame oil prior to showering. ...

the short answer is ...invigorating!! :-)

I like big butts

So there's an old episode of Scrubs, where Turk says to JD, "When a black girl asks 'does my butt look big?' you say 'Hell Ya!'" The reasoning being that in the black community, curves are highly prized...and women go out of their way to accentuate them.

Then there's the rest of us, who lament the size of our legs (there's an old blues song that talks about "Big legs, and a tight skirt") and how our butts stick out (I like big butts and i cannot lie)

Just goes to show you the difference between cultures.

What's my point? hmmm. Take a lesson. All women are pretty. it's just a fact of life...

ok. sleepy now. go say "i'm pretty" to yourself. you'll feel better.